She decided to lace up her heart strings. No longer would she sit back and simply let life happen to her. She wouldn’t allow herself to wait and see what anyone chose for her future.
What she deserved was the best this life had to offer in life, love, career, and dreams. Accomplishments were fleeting. Defeating challenges be they great or small only temporarily brought a feeling of euphoria.
The shame of the next decision would pass, what was more important was the need to be free, to be expressive, to be passionate about life, to be passionate about each day without the looming cloud of instability that seemed to come with each connection.
There would be no notice given to loved ones because the journey, this journey, albeit familiar, it was all together different. She had to do this alone. Things were different because there was no sulking. There was no broken spirit accompanying her thought process. There was an awareness. A keen understanding of what was.
There was a knowing that what she deserved, what she should have, what she was entitled to was better. That word, better, meant so much.
That word better had been the precursor to a life altering decision to stand in the ashes, walk out of the ashes and into new.
The fight to gain entry into new was brutal in the past, but it was necessary and so she had to hold onto it by any means. She had to honor what had been given to her, previously. She had to honor the transformation and not regress into a shell of a person.
There was no sadness involved in what had settled in her heart. There was a feeling of triumph because she saw early enough to save herself.
She laced up the strings of her heart, breathed in deeply and went forward. There was no time to look back. Better was on the horizon, again.
nyourownwords 